Tis Pity He's a Writer

Richard Daybell – Novels, stories and short humor

And the 1% Shall Inherit the Earth

In the beginning, on the very first day of the Romney presidency, He tore asunder Obamacare, smiting it silly, keeping just the popular parts and banishing the unpopular parts to a nether world. And He looked at health care and said: “This is good.”

On the second day, He summoned forth from near and far His Job Creators and said unto them create jobs. And lo! they created 10 million jobs. And He looked at those jobs and said: “This is good.”

On the third day, He created a foreign policy and spread it throughout the world. It was forceful, confounding our enemies, putting fear in their hearts, and bringing our friends to bow down before us with love in their hearts. And he looked at foreign policy and said: “This is good.”

On the fourth day, He balanced the budget by cutting taxes, and the people said it is a miracle and knelt down before Him in gratitude for their grandchildren. And He said: “It’s not only a miracle, it is good.”

On the fifth day, He eliminated all class warfare. And He did this by eliminating the middle class, and dividing the remainder into the Haves and the Have Nots, each to share the bounty of the earth, according to their own kind. And He stood with the Haves and said: “Have dominion over the fishes of the sea, the birds, the crawling creatures, and the 47%.” And He added: “This is good.”

On the sixth day, He eliminated trickle down government, privatizing all services and giving the people vouchers and dollar-off coupons to buy their services. He eliminated Congress and replaced it with a board of directors. And in this brave new nation, there was no longer any need for taxes, for courts, for super PACs, for elections. And He said: “This is good.”

And on the seventh day, being a little weary, he rested from all the wondrous things He had done. And He said: “This is darn good.”



10 comments on “And the 1% Shall Inherit the Earth

  1. bharatwrites
    October 10, 2012

    Seems like an oversimplification, but a funny one!


    • Richard Daybell
      October 10, 2012

      I strive for funny and oversimplification. I usually succeed at the latter.


  2. Louella Bryant
    October 11, 2012

    This is a good ‘un. Keep them coming.


  3. elroyjones
    October 11, 2012

    You are funny! Your Royal Czarness, I am afraid. I was Somwhere Else for a couple of days this week and I watched an HBO “documentary” interview of unhappy Democrats and Independents who voted for Obama last time around and would be voting for Rmoney this time. It was horrifying. I will never watch HBO again.


    • Richard Daybell
      October 11, 2012

      I can’t understand how people can flip from one side to another on what seems like a daily basis. Obama gave a poor debate performance; I don’t like him anymore. I didn’t like Romney yesterday because he was a conservative; I like him today because he’s a moderate. I can understand people my age not being able to remember what a candidate said yesterday, but c’mon. We can only hope they’ll forget where they’re supposed to vote.


  4. Alex Jessup
    October 12, 2012

    Reblogged this on Stuff Alex Thinks.


  5. gkinnard
    October 14, 2012



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